What is Grief?

What is grief? This is something no one could ever explain to me, and often nobody wanted to talk about it. Now I think I understand why. It is something that one has to experience to fully understand. Like many, I’ve had a lot of traumas in my life that made me gradually close my heart so that I wouldn’t feel so much. And when I see how many humans function, this is what we’ve been conditioned to believe is how we should handle grief. This closing of my heart caused me to store a lot of unprocessed emotions in my body instead of allowing myself to feel all of the emotion and allowing it to flow through me.

Over the past few days so many stored losses have come up for me and this morning I received the news that my awesome, loving uncle transitioned. At first, I felt nothing and carried on with my morning, planning to call my aunt & cousins. Then guidance came through that I should send them messages instead. As I was typing the messages, I started feeling the love my uncle had for me. I spent a lot of my childhood with this family and loved it. They are all no-nonsense down to earth kind of people that accepted me as I was. All the amazing memories of him started coming back to me. He made me feel super special, by giving me a special “name”.

He, like my grandma were the kind people whose door was always open to help others. So, as I grieve the loss of my uncle and the rest of my Ancestors, I allow whatever needs to surface to do so. I chose to no longer store these emotions in my body. I understand that as humans we are all birthed & we will all die. I understand that a soul leaves once it is ready and it is always for the highest good of all… even if it can be challenging or uncomfortable. This doesn’t mean that I should ignore my emotions. All of it is part of my human experience and it is helping me to understand this type of emotion better, allowing me to show even more compassion towards those that have lost a loved one. I also get to experience a deeper connection to my body and all its subtle energy bodies.

I am allowing myself to feel everything and observe myself as I go through every emotion so that I can allow the energy to flow through me. This doesn’t mean getting caught up in the thoughts. It means simply feeling the emotions.

I am so blessed to have and have had beings, humans & other, in my life that loved me unconditionally and saw me as the unique being that I am, even when I had forgotten.

I hold so much gratitude in my heart for these beautiful beings. Thank you, thank you, thank you!